Project Aon

15: The Darke Crusade

Pending
Pending (Not Errata)
Fixed (Errata)
(er)Many:on to -> onto (REJECTED: 140 [held on to]; 222 [opens on to]; 250 [hangs on to]; 348 [hang on to])
(FIXED: 35, 336 [climb onto]; 35, 314, 336 [leap onto]; 72, 349 [roll...onto]; 92, 132, 205 [yourself...onto]; 111 [over onto]; 118 (Caption) [up onto]; 253 [onto the back]; 258 [crashing onto]; 342 [out onto])
(er)The Story So Far:monastery of the Kai -> Monastery of the Kai
(er)The Story So Far:new-found -> newfound
(er)The Story So Far:the occupants will have long since brought about their own extinction. Elsewhere, throughout Northern Magnamund, peace reigns victorious [Sasha Cooper: There's a paragraph break after 'their own extinction' in the other novels] [so: This is Errata. I think it should be changed so 'Elsewhere, throughout Northern Magnamund...' is a separate paragraph because it is in the previous books, and it is in the following book, The Legacy of Vashna.]
(er)The Story So Far:north-east -> northeast
(er)The Story So Far:Left-Handed and Old Kingdom Magic -> Left-handed and Old Kingdom magic
(er)The Story So Far:Right-Handed Magic -> Right-handed magic
(er)The Story So Far:Left-Handed Magic -> Left-handed magic
(er)The Story So Far:Akagazad and Kaag -> Akagazad, and Kaag
(er)The Story So Far:he replied, ‘Were the -> he replied, ‘were the [tp]
(er)The Story So Far [x3]:Magic -> magic
(er)The Game Rules:ENDURANCE points fall to zero -> ENDURANCE points fall to zero or below
(er)Grand Master Disciplines:limited immunity to flames, toxic gases, corrosive liquids. -> limited immunity to flames, toxic gases, and corrosive liquids.
(er)Grand Master Disciplines [x2]:battle wounds -> battle-wounds
(er)Disciplines:artifacts -> artefacts
(er)Disciplines:battle magic -> battle-magic
(er)Disciplines:venoms and toxins -> venoms, and toxins right [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
(er)Disciplines [Kai-screen]:The strength and capacity of these fortresses increases -> increase [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)Disciplines [Telegnosis]:Duration, and the protection of his inanimate body, increases -> Duration and the protection of his inanimate body increase [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)Disciplines:Grand Huntmastery -> footnote re: meals [DED: It is only in the Equipment section that is says "If you have chosen the Discipline of Grand Huntmastery as one of your skills, you will not need to tick off a Meal when instructed to eat." I was playing last night and I didn't read this line until after I'd already chosen Grand Huntmastery, and then chosen 2 Meals for my equipment. We could add a footnote here to explain the relevance of Huntmastery to meals]
[jb: Add to main body as (er)]
(er)Equipment:a sword or an axe -> a Sword or an Axe [LM / jb]
(er)Rules for Combat:This process of combat continues until ENDURANCE points of either the enemy or Lone Wolf are reduced to zero, ... If the enemy is dead, Lone Wolf proceeds but with his ENDURANCE points reduced. -> This process of combat continues until the ENDURANCE points of either the enemy or Lone Wolf are reduced to zero or below, ... If the enemy is dead, Lone Wolf proceeds but with his ENDURANCE points possibly reduced.
(er)Rules for Combat:at which point the one with the zero score is declared dead. -> at which point that combatant is declared dead.
(er)Improved Disciplines:Brotherhood spells -> Brotherhood Spells
(er)Improved Disciplines:(i.e. arrows, axes, crossbow bolts, etc.) -> (e.g. arrows, axes, crossbow bolts) [so: Also (ne) in Books 16-20]
(er)Grand Master Wisdom:"...into the helotry of Nyras." [tp: As "helotry" ("serfdom" or "slavedom") is used more or less as part of the name of the country (like "kingdom"), should it be capitalised?]
[so: Cf. Book 23: (er) The Story So Far: "kingdom of Siyen -> Kingdom of Siyen" and "Kingdom of Bor" in Books 26 and 27]
(er)1:says, 'This -> says, 'this
(er)2:Drakkar sword -> Drakkarim sword [PAMoS]
(er)3:your guide, then suddenly -> your guide; then suddenly [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)8, 316:long pause, then a -> long pause; then a [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)8:suggests that he escorts -> suggests that he escort [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: subjunctive mode?]
[bk: Agreed.]
(er)11 [x2], 18, 121, 140, 175 [x2], 297, 333 [x2], 347:wintery -> wintry
(er)11, 27, 175, 333:draft -> draught
(er)12, 57, 127, 169, 170, 268, 272, 311:Tukodaks [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: Elsewhere 'Tukodak' is used as the plural form]
[so: Tukodaks -> Tukodak guards]
[jb: As much as I hate to bring up something that we put behind us ;) since the name is almost certainly of Giak origin (Bow Guards?) I think we should apply the same logic as our Drakkar/Drakkarim standard. So -
Tukodak (singular)
Tukodakim (plural)
Tuodakim (adjective)
This would entail a few changes throughout the book.
12, 57, 127, 169, 170, 268, 272 (x2), 311: Tukodaks -> Tukodakim
27, 45, 57, 59, 100, 151, 200, 255, 268, 272, 280, 300: Tukodak -> Tukodakim]
[bk: If we want to pluralize Tukodak, given that the plural of "orgadak" (human) is "orgadaka", shouldn't the plural of "Tukodak" be "Tukodaka"? ]
[cn: unless we have a documented usage of the plural form then shouldnt we just leave it alone? AFAIK there were precedents for drakkarim/nadziranim/ligan in the text and so we were just trying to standardize those cases. both -im and -a are guesses (albeit backed up with logic), and in my opinion equally (in)valid. after all, the plural of tokodak could be tokodak.]
[so: I don't have a problem fixing it, but I don't fancy having to reverse it should we ultimately decide otherwise. ;-) ]
[jb: I withdraw my (admittedly speculative) suggestion. I think we should standardize with "Tukodak" as the plural. Maybe something about "Tukodaks" grates on my nerves (though now that I think about it "Giaks" seems OK...).]
[so: Done. Changed to "Tukodak Guards" in combat to make clear there are multiple opponents.]
(er)13:small secluded cover -> small secluded cove (as in parallel sections) [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)15, 234, 341:en route [foreign]
(er)16:the cabin, then, as -> the cabin; then, as [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)17, 86, 104, 136, 152, 167, 207, 232, 256, 308, 332, 338, 339, 340:Brotherhood spell -> Brotherhood Spell
(er)17:mid-air, then it -> mid-air; then it [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)19:'we must get away -> 'We must get away [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007] [so: feet, 'we -> feet. 'We]
(er)19:him so, then he -> him so; then he [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)23:each craft, then you -> each craft; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)25:to succeed, therefore no -> to succeed; therefore no [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)25, 227, 258, 277, 339:Tozaz forest-> Tozaz Forest
(er)31:It is near to exhaustion -> He is near to exhaustion (to match 'he' later in sentence) [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)31:Kai rank of -> rank of Kai
(er)35, 136, 160, 253, 336:Drakkar lancer -> Drakkarim lancer [PAMoS]
(er)36, 79:new-found -> newfound
(er)38:the Arrow, then its -> the Arrow; then its [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)38, 72, 148, 185, 349:suspecting trickery, then slowly -> suspecting trickery. Then slowly [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)40, 304:faint click, then the -> faint click; then the [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)40, 304:click [onomatepoeia]
(er)41:timberwolf -> timber wolf
(er)41:Replaced 'treeline' with 'tree line' [...] [Alter fix of treeline -> tree-line; update Errata entry]
(er)43:at worse -> at worst [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[so: I agree]
(er)45:in agreement then together -> in agreement; then together [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)47:unnatural silence, then suddenly -> unnatural silence; then suddenly [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)51, 155, 264, 284:t'is -> 'tis
(er)51, 279:the icy-cold waters -> the icy cold waters
(er)51, 135, 155, 264, 284:much-needed -> much needed [IK: as per PAMoS]
(er)56, 117:With your advanced skills it is easy for you to sense immediately that the coin is showing heads [This reference leads to 117 where the coin is revealed as heads, but also to 298 where the coin is mysteriously showing tails] [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
[jc: Sections 56, 117 and 298 are somewhat nonsensical. I suggest the following changes: As sections 117 and 298 show different coin sides, the sentence "With your advanced skills it is easy for you to sense immediately that the coin is showing heads, but Prarg is not so gifted." should be deleted from section 56. Also it should be added "'Heads!' says Prarg." in the section 117 before the first paragraph (as it is in section 298). Then both sections 117 and 298 are correct.]
[jb: Rather than deleting entirely the offending sentence in 56, I'd change it to: "With your advanced skills it is easy for you to sense immediately what the coin is showing, but Prarg is not so gifted." Agreed about adding "'Heads!' says Prarg."]
(er)59:If you have reached the rank of Sun Knight add 2. -> If you have reached the rank of Sun Knight, add 2. [jc]
(er)67:complete silence, then he -> complete silence; then he [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)70:rusty cover, then you -> rusty cover; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)75:reply, 'Let -> reply. 'Let
(er)78:slabs of rock, veined marble and other temple debris -> slabs of rock, veined marble, and other temple debris [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)83:weapon, 'The -> weapon. 'The
(er)84:the creatures who inhabit this morass -> the creatures that inhabit this morass
(er)84, 135:bowhead [Is this OK?]
[bk: Suggestion: bowhead -> prow ]
[so: Yeah, I'd second this suggestion as a preference; good call.]
[tp: As an alternative that stays closer to the original word, I'd suggest "bowsprit", but "prow" is probably more accurate when we're dealing with a boat rather than a sailing ship.]
[jb: I'm no salt, but I don't think it's possible to tie anything to a prow since it usually implies the part of the bow just above the water, and bowsprit really does seem to imply a sailing ship, and unless Dever's referring to a latrine projecting from the front of the boat, I think we should change this. If we're going for authenticity/obscurity, "bitt" may apply. However, I think "bow" or "stem" are better choices, especially "stem".]
(er)85, 118, 149, 201, 270:Drakkar officer -> Drakkarim officer [PAMoS]
(er)90:north east -> north-east [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[so: north east -> northeast as per PAMoS]
(er)91:Tunnel Stalker, then you -> Tunnel Stalker; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)93:bowfire [Is this OK?]
[so: "bow-fire" (cf. "bow-skill" errata in Section 336 of 18dotd.]
(er)93:scream, 'Halt -> scream. 'Halt
(er)95, 341:crusader's -> crusaders' [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)101, 147, 182:Drakkarim Death Knight sergeant [tp: "Sergeant" is capitalised in sections 101 and 147, and also in 182... but "Death Knight sergeant" (lower-case s) appears in section 63. The Manual of Style says to not capitalise any title lower than nobility unless it's in front of a name, but that doesn't seem to have been followed, especially where the title goes with a description (like "Death Knight") that is capitalised; at the very least, it overlaps with the next rule, "Enemy and Creature Names". "Sergeant" in general seems to be uncapitalised, but on the other hand, look at some parallel uses of other titles (like "the Captain" in 13, 23 and probably other sections, and "a Captain", "Lencian Captain" in section 150 -- but "a captain of" in 150's illustration caption).]
[jb: I think it should be "sergeant" and "captain" unless it appears with a name or it appears as a combat. If so, "Sergeant" should be changed in 101, 147, and 182. "Captain" appears in many more places. I haven't checked other books.]
[so: Lower-casing "Captain" and "Sergeant" affects Books 5, 13, 14, 15, 17, 18, 21, 22, 23, 24, 27, and 28. All fixed.]
(er)102 [x2], 158, 227:Kai mastery -> Kai Mastery [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)104:evoke -> invoke [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[so: Joe is probably thinking of "evocation", but invoke is a better word here]
(er)108:hear splashes, then suddenly -> hear splashes; then suddenly [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)110:Elder Magi battle spell -> Elder Magi Battle-spell
(er)111:to strike, then, with -> to strike; then, with [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)117, 309:timberline -> timber-line
(er)117:breaths -> breathes
(er)123:approaching footsteps, then through -> approaching footsteps; then through [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)125:city gates, then you -> city gates; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)125:slayed -> slew
(er)129:no response, then a -> no response; then a [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)129:Nyras Timberwolves -> Nyras timber wolves [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)129:timberwolves -> timber wolves
(er)137:berates them, then he -> berates them; then he [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)137:to pass, then you -> to pass; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)140:Slovarian plain -> Slovarian Plain
(er)140:hard pressed -> hard-pressed [IK: as per PAMoS]
(er)142, 317:zig-zagging -> zigzagging
(er)143:power-word battle spell -> battle-spell Power Word [also: Power Word (spell) (er)]
(er)148:your blow, then its -> your blow; then its [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)148:their sockets, then stiffly -> their sockets; then stiffly [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)149:the group, then dutifully -> the group; then dutifully [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)149:you discover that is -> you discover that it is [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
(er)150:another Drakkar trick -> another Drakkarim trick [PAMoS]
(er)154:knight's ENDURANCE to zero -> knight's ENDURANCE to zero or below
(er)158:you can, then you -> you can; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)159:Prarg, 'If -> Prarg. 'If
(er)162:flailing wildly, then it -> flailing wildly; then it [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)162:rusty bars, then you -> rusty bars; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)163:who instinctively you recognize -> whom instinctively you recognize [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: Agreed.]
[tp: Since we're talking about an Akataz pack-leader, can I suggest "which" instead of "who(m)"?]
[jb: I like Tim's suggestion of "which". Keeps it from sounding formal, if nothing else.]
(er)165:Tozaz forest, then, the -> Tozaz Forest; then, the [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007
(er)166:The garrison is thrown into a state of near-panic as they -> The garrison is thrown into a state of near-panic as it [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[jb: I'd reject this one based on the collective noun being able to take either a singular or plural verb.]
[bk: The issue I have with the text as written is that the sentence starts "The garrison is" (singular verb, indicating the garrison is acting as one) and then refers to the garrison as "they" (plural pronoun, indicating the members of the garrison are acting as individuals). We should either change it to Leroy's suggestion or conversely change the beginning of the sentence to "The garrison are".]
[jb: Fair point. Given that, I'd vote for the original suggestion, changing it to read "The garrison is thrown into a state of near-panic as it...".]
(er)176:your mate Kai skills -> your innate Kai skills [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[so: Errata - inate -> innate]
(er)180:quiver -> Quiver [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)183:your attack, then suddenly -> your attack; then suddenly [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)184:to flight of stone steps -> to a flight of stone steps [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)184:calls, 'I -> calls. 'I
(er)187:By the Gods,
(er)189:the failing light, and the increasing sightings of Drakkarim patrols, forces -> the failing light, and the increasing sightings of Drakkarim patrols, force [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[jb: If we want to make it more obviously parenthetical, we could use dashes instead of commas (cf. Errata for 14tcok 10, 213).]
(er)190:pulses, directly -> pulses directly [Neil McGrory Jan 2007]
(er)190:end-over-end, then, with -> end-over-end; then, with [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)190:head first -> head-first
(er)192: tree line -> tree-line
(er)193:smooth, dry and crumbly, -> smooth, dry, and crumbly, [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)200:top his -> top of his [Rahenna, 1 Dec 2009]
(er)201:his death, then a -> his death; then a [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)202:the beach then, shaking -> the beach; then, shaking [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)204:Drakkar warrior -> Drakkarim warrior [PAMoS]
(er)204:Drakkar guard -> Drakkarim guard [PAMoS]
(er)205:speartips -> spear tips
(er)207:entire arm, then a -> entire arm; then a [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)208:who, or what, -> who--or what--
[so: Also affects 02tfc 16.]
[jb: That makes the aside stand out better with the other commas happening in that sentence.]
(er)215:he needs, then, with -> he needs; then, with [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)222:a halt, then, very -> a halt; then, very [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)227:it antlered head -> its antlered head [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)227:through forest -> through the forest [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)227:tree-line, then you -> tree line; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)240:steadily louder, then several -> steadily louder; then several [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)244:Drakkar Lancer -> Drakkarim Lancer [PAMoS]
(er)245:to pass, then you -> to pass; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)248:heavy losses, then a -> heavy losses; then a [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)248:Their armour, and the sheer weight of their attack, smashes -> Their armour, and the sheer weight of their attack, smash [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[jb: If we want to make it more obviously parenthetical, we could use dashes instead of commas (cf. Errata for 14tcok 10, 213).]
(er)248:wave of Drakkarim cavalry slam -> wave of Drakkarim cavalry slams [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: These two make sense because the second wave is then referred to in the singular.]
(er)248:against the square and are -> against the square and is [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: These two make sense because the second wave is then referred to in the singular.]
(er)250:aid, 'Stand -> aid. 'Stand
(er)257:Boradon mountains -> Boradon Mountains [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
(er)258:The Gods are watching over us
(er)259:horse trough, then they -> horse trough; then they [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)260:patrol, 'I'll -> patrol. 'I'll
(er)260:Thank the Gods
(er)264:and stiffen, then, with -> and stiffen; then, with [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)264:says, 'Never -> says. 'Never
(er)270:arching -> arcing
(er)274:be raining, then you -> be raining; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)275:a small cabin hidden among the trees. It comprises four white canvas tents [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: should 'cabin' be 'camp' as in parallel sections?]
[so: It should be changed to camp]
(er)279:a shudder, then suddenly -> a shudder; then suddenly [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)280:a trio of Magnaarn's Tukodak bodyguards leap out and seizes him -> a trio of Magnaarn's Tukodak bodyguards leap out and seize him [bk]
(er)282:Using your Pathsmanship skills, -> Using your Huntmastery skills, [jc: maybe better?]
[jb: Agreed.]
(er)288:of focus, then darkness -> of focus; then darkness [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)290:If you possess Kai-alchemy [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: This probably should include 'and wish to use it,' because 'Any attempt to pick this lock could prove fatal.']
[jb: Agreed, though a footnote may be more appropriate so it doesn't change official gameplay.]
(er)298:You remove your hand to reveal the citadel of Holmgard stamped on the reverse side of the coin. [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: According to ref.56, the coin is showing 'heads']
[so: See the changes made to 56 and 117.]
(er)314:you further, then the -> you further; then the [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)314:climb them, then you -> climb them; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)319:north-westerly -> northwesterly
(er)322:the oars, then together -> the oars; then together [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)323:to pass, then you -> to pass; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)323:neckchain -> neck-chain
(er)325:'we must -> 'We must [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[so: urgently, 'we -> urgently. 'We]
(er)328:north-west -> northwest
(er)329:have seen, then you -> have seen; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)337:<foreign> tags for Giak
(er)346:a stream of bubbles are trailing -> a stream of bubbles trails
(er)346:stream of bubbles are -> stream of bubbles is [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: It looks like you've already found a good workaround here.]
(er)Combat Rules Summary:This is when ENDURANCE points of either character fall to 0. -> This is when ENDURANCE points of either character falls to 0 or below.
(er)Combat Rules Summary:Pick number from Random-> Pick a number from the Random
(er)Combat Rules Summary:Turn to Combat -> Turn to the Combat
(er)Combat Rules Summary:to random number -> to the random number
(er)Combat Rules Summary:when ENDURANCE -> when the ENDURANCE
(er)Combat Rules Summary:ignored, -> ignored;
Fixed (Not Errata)
(ne)The Story So Far:peoples of the Free Kingdom -> peoples of the Free Kingdoms [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
(ne)The Story So Far:weighing plight of -> weighing the plight of [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
(ne)The Story So Far:[paragraph 5] Your discovery, has inspired -> Your discovery has inspired [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(ne)Disciplines:this, the first -> this, the third [jb: check to verify the original wording] [so: the original wording is "set in Book 15 of the Lone Wolf Grand Master series"] [William Mobbs reported Aug 2006]
(ne)Equipment:adventures. (Books -> adventures (Books [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
(ne)Improved Disciplines:levels of Kai Grand Mastery you will -> levels of Kai Grand Mastery, you will
(ne)Improved Disciplines:Guardian -> Kai Grand Guardian
(ne)5:as your fist[.] [Rahenna: Missing period at the end.]
(ne)23, Errata:reverse 'river bank -> riverbank' [to preserve consistency of 'river bank' throughout LW series]
(ne)29:You check your map and discover it to be a fortified Drakkarim stronghold. -> You check your map and discover it to be Konozod, a fortified Drakkarim stronghold. [As in parallel sections] [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(ne)41:fright; the -> fright, the [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(ne)67:stairs to tower door -> stairs to the tower door [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(ne)89, 221:[so: Can we improve these puzzles for partially-sighted readers?]
(ne)93:dose by -> close by [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
(ne)121, 297, Footnotes [x2]:fall to zero -> fall to zero or below
(ne)123:you. Grand -> you, Grand [Rahenna, 1 Dec 2009]
(ft)156:Also, erase any Meals you may have been carrying in your Backpack, and erase any potions of Laumspur and/or Alether.
[jfs: Does this apply to "jars" (as opposed to potions) too? Since jars (obtained in #13) might contain more than one dose of Laumpsur / Alether it is quite unfair to have LoneWolf dispose of them fully if he is carrying these.]
[jfs: Is Laumwort omitted from this list intentionally? Or should it be added there too?]
[Amarande: Other healing potions aren't mentioned, either, and there are a number of them (e.g., Larnuma, Oxydine, Oede, Kourshah, Baylon's Fungi, Silver Flask, etc.). I think we should trust in Joe here that he said "Laumspur" specifically and not "ENDURANCE restoring Backpack Items."]
[Amarande: I do think it should apply to the Jars, though; IMO the Jars are merely Potions that contain multiple doses in a single Backpack Item slot, they are not intrinsically different from the potions. (As far as I recall there are VERY few cases where Joe specifically indicates a specific potion from among a given 'strain' of potions. E.g., book 3 where only the colored concentrates are usable in certain situations, or book 5 when you can only use a Tincture of Graveweed, not a concentrate. In just about every other case I've seen, Laumspur is Laumspur, etc.) ]
[JohnTFS: I have to disagree with this. Let's look objectively at the situation. LW is buried alive and has to slowly dig his way free while slowly dying of starvation and thirst. He's going to be eating/drinking anything he has on him that will restore Endurance, give him strength or otherwise function as food. The only things he wouldn't logically drink would be items that are either poisonous or non-nutritious, like Sabito. So, yes, he'll eat/drink Laumwort, Oede, the wine in the Silver flask, Oxydine and anything else like that.]
[dd: I’d agree with John’s view here.]
[jb: "Given the extreme situation, you should probably erase all healing and strength potions and related items from your Action Chart, even those not listed here (e.g. Oede, Larnuma, etc.)."]
(ne)162:brisk pace: After a -> brisk pace. After a [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(ne)171:. it is a landmark -> . It is a landmark [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(ft)190, 312:[Should use of Kai-surge cost 1EP? Currently the use in these sections is 'free'][Neil McGrory Jan 2007]
(ne)204:and. he -> and he [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(ne)260:gaolers' -> gaolers [Neil McGrory, Jan 2007]
(er)315:[tw: Section 315 is almost completely wrong in its description of what actually happened at Cetza: "During the fighting at Cetza you and he led Prince Graygor's reserves in a decisive action that helped save the Eruan Guards and turn the tide of the battle in your favour." Er, no. You (LW) may lead the Prince's reserves to help save the Eruan Palace Guard, but then you *don't* fight together with Prarg. What you do together with Prarg is to gather scattered soldiers to help save the Lencian knights in their struggle at the bridge.]
[jb: head, desk. That definitely needs to change, IMHO. How should we word that?]
[so: Does this affect 17tdoi Section 305 as well?]
[jb: I forget: are you guaranteed to meet Prarg there? If so, we can simplify the passage. Otherwise, I'm going to chicken out on rewriting this passage and suggest that we just footnote the fact that this description does not reflect what really happened at the Battle of Cetza. It does not affect 17tdoi Section 305 at all.]
[so: You are not guaranteed to meet Prarg; to do so you must visit Section 148.]
(ne)335:With a shriek; the -> With a shriek, the [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(ne)Errata:Replaced 'COMBAT SKILL is reduced to 8 points or less' with 'ENDURANCE is reduced to 8 points or less' since it is highly unlikely that your COMBAT SKILL will ever be reduced to such a low level and later published books also make this change. -> Changed 'COMBAT SKILL' to 'ENDURANCE' according to Lone Wolf Club Newsletter 24.
(ne)Footnotes (Disciplines):mastery of an additional Kai weapon. ... you can choose an additional Weapon from the list to have Mastery of. -> mastery of an additional Weapon. ... you can choose an additional Weapon from the list to have mastery of.
(ne)Footnotes (Disciplines):See the Grand Master Rules section of the Rules Handbook for details.-> See the Grand Master Rules section of the Readers' Handbook for details. [and link to: http://www.projectaon.org/en/ReadersHandbook]
(ne)Footnote (Section 5, 40):Link back to riddle source sections (i.e. add '...in Section xxx' to the end of each footnote).
(ne)Footnote (Sections 121, 297):fall to zero -> fall to zero or below
Rejected
(er)Many:[LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: I marked each instance (that I noticed) of the giak plural ending '-im' being used with a singular noun or adjective. However, I ignored each instance when the '-im' ending was used with a noun used as a plural adjective (e.g. drakkarim horsemen). after finishing my read though i realised that in nouns used as adjectives in English the singular form is usually (always?) used (e.g. bank vaults. banks vaults would sound silly). if this rule applies to giak loan words as well, there are a number more erroneous incidences which I did not indicate in the list.
The Story So Far (Nadziranim power);
16, 124, 232, 266, 295 (Drakkarim sergeant);
17, 29, 77, 251, 269, 278, 287 (Drakkarim stronghold);
26, 64, 146, 252, 330 (Drakkarim guard);
39, 231, 314 (Drakkarim garrison);
The Story So Far [x3], 39 (Nadziranim sorcerers);
42, 42 (Cap), 161 (Nadziranim sorcerer);
46 (Drakkarim backpack);
50 (Drakkarim escort);
63 (Drakkarim warrior);
65 (Drakkarim encampment);
65 (Drakkarim officer);
71 (Drakkarim platoon);
90, 260 (Drakkarim patrol);
90 (Drakkarim town);
95, 234, 341 (Nadziranim allies);
101, 147, 182 (Drakkarim Death Knight Sergeant);
105 (Drakkarim cavalry platoon);
125 (Nadziranim wizard);
150 (not Drakkarim or Lencian);
198, 232 (Drakkarim Sergeant);
213 (Drakkarim commander);
257 (Drakkarim machine);
262 (Drakkarim cavalry);
272 (Drakkarim horde)]
[This also has implications for most other LW books.]
[JB: Drakkarim [adj.] -> Drakkar: both forms are valid when used as an adjective]
(er)The Story So Far:granite and gold, you -> granite and gold you
(er)The Story So Far [par. 8]:In the regions to the northeast of Magador and the Maakengorge, -> to the northwest of Magador and the Maakengorge [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[so: IMHO, 'northeast of Magador' is correct]
(ft)Disciplines:Psi-surge -> hidden loyalty bonus [DED: If you have successfully completed previous Lone Wolf Kai or Magnakai adventures, where you possessed the disciplines of Mindblast and/or Psi-surge, you can still benefit from these COMBAT SKILL bonuses in the Grand Master books. Mindblast and Kai-surge cannot be used simultaneously. In Lone Wolf Club Newsletter No.28, Joe Dever referred to these as "hidden loyalty bonuses" for players who had completed earlier books]
[SO: See the Readers' Handbook]
(ft)Disciplines:Huntmastery -> hidden loyalty bonus footnote [DED: Suggested footnote: If you have successfully completed previous Lone Wolf Magnakai adventures, where you possessed the discipline of Huntmastery, you can still use this to avoid having to tick off a meal when instructed to eat in in the Grand Master books. In Lone Wolf Club Newsletter No.28, Joe Dever referred to this as a "hidden loyalty bonus" for players who had completed earlier books. Note that Ixia is an icy desert, so you will not be able to use your basic Kai Discipline of Hunting in this way.]
[SO: See the Readers' Handbook]
(ft)Disciplines:Hidden Loyalty Bonus for Curing -> proposed footnote: [DED: Suggested footnote: If you have successfully completed previous Lone Wolf Kai or Magnakai adventures, where you possessed the disciplines of Healing and/or Curing, you can still restore 1 lost EP for each section without combat in the Grand Master books. Such bonuses are not cumulative - the point from Curing replaces the one from Healing. In Lone Wolf Club Newsletter No.28, Joe Dever referred to these as "hidden loyalty bonuses" for players who had completed earlier books.]
[SO: See the Readers' Handbook]
(ft)Disciplines:Weaponmastery -> new footnote for hidden loyalty bonuses [DED: Suggested footnote: If you have successfully completed previous Lone Wolf Kai or Magnakai adventures, where you possessed the disciplines of Weaponskill and/or Weaponmastery, you can still benefit from these COMBAT SKILL bonuses in the Grand Master books. Such bonuses are not cumulative - bonuses from Weaponmastery replace those for Weaponskill, and bonuses from Grand Weaponmastery replace both of these. In Lone Wolf Club Newsletter No.28, Joe Dever referred to these as "hidden loyalty bonuses" for players who had completed earlier books.]
[SO: See the Readers' Handbook]
(er)Equipment:[Does Grand Weaponmastery with Bow give +3 or +5 when picking a number from the RNT? (cf. 14TCoK Section 73)]
(er)Equipment:Bows and Arrows - If you have the Discipline of Grand Weaponmastery with a Bow, you may add 3 to any number that you pick from the Random Number Table, when using the Bow -> "...you may add 5 to any number..." ? [DED: Not sure if this is a typo in the rules or deliberate: I thought the original "+3" bonus for arrows matched the +3CS for Magnakai weaponmastery? And when you progress to higher ranks, the bonus rises to higher values? - actually maybe not, advanced discipline for Mentora gives you an extra +2 on a fired or thrown weapon, whilst advanced discipline for Scion-Kai gives +4 CS in general - so they're not the same thing - however do we want another "hidden loyalty bonus" footnote to say you can still use your Mentora Weaponmastery bonus?]
(er)Grand Master's Wisdom:a wise choice will enable any player -> a wise choice will enable all players [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007: To agree with 'their' in number]
(er)Improved Disciplines:[jc: Kai-alchemy: spell 'Strength', books 15-20. Should the increase of CS be standardized? In Dawn of the Darklords, there is stated that 'Casting this spell will increase your COMBAT SKILL by 3 points for the duration of one combat, at the cost of 3 ENDURANCE points. It cannot be used if your ENDURANCE points total is below 10.'. IMHO, even +3 to CS could help players with lower base CS.]
[so: It works differently depending on what Joe wants the spell to do in each situation, so it's better to leave that one alone--unless the Mongoose editions make such a change, of course!]
(er)1:old friend, then you -> old friend; then you [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
(er)21:few words, then they -> few words; then they [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)21, 54, 95, 248, 267:Zagganozod [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: ?? (armour + horse)]
[jb: That would be my interpretation. I'm not sure what's being suggested.]
[lm: I think I was wondering if it shouldn't be 'Zaggonnozod' (zaggan + nozod).]
[jb: I don't know of any Giak examples off the top of my head, but I wouldn't be surprised to find that compounds often drop repetitive letters. I think it's best to leave as-is.]
(er)22, 31, 66, 107, 159, 279, 317:Grand Guardian or higher, -> Grand Guardian, or higher,
(er)36, 233:his breath, then he -> his breath; then he [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)60, 257:mudflats -> mud-flats
(er)61:his men, then you -> his men; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)93:of bowfire, then two -> of bowfire; then two [LeRoy McSwain, Jan 2007]
(er)115:A troop of Drakkarim cavalry are -> A troop of Drakkarim cavalry is [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: It seems like in this and most other cases, we have a phrase along the lines of "A group of Xes", which to me sounds more normal if the verb is in the plural.]
(er)118:come a regiment -> comes a regiment [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: This one sounds better to me in the singular, but for the fact that the next sentence begins by referring to the regiment as "they", so the members are acting independently.]
(er)125:group of Lencians are -> group of Lencians is [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: See the comment to 115. The Lencians aren't fighting as one.]
(er)125:A regiment of Lencian Crusaders are -> A regiment of Lencian Crusaders is [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: See the comment to 115. The Lencians aren't fighting as one.]
(er)141:in future -> in the future [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[so: idiosyncratic UK-specific usage. IMHO this is OK]
[bk: I use "in future" on this side of the pond, too It sounds odd to me at the end of the sentence, though, and I'd probably move it to before "he should watch".]
[so: I think your suggestion would make the sentence more grammatically sound, though I would probably use "...in future" at the end of a phrase when speaking. After consideration, I'd tentatively second your proposal.]
[tp: Hardly UK-specific! It's pretty safe to assume that all UK usages are also used in Australia (and therefore supported by me) in future. ;-) Or without the poor attempt at wit: I vote to reject.]
[jb: I'm OK with it as-is. I've heard it that way reasonably often]
(er)145, 265, 342:[so: Should "bang" be italicised here?]
[jb: Bang can definitely be an onomatopoeia. It's one of the most cited examples. I think it works here, though I'm not sure it would work in every case.]
[so: Let's leave it italicised, then.]
(er)147:backfire -> back-fire
(er)158, 192, 289:Kai rank of -> rank of
(ft)163:[DED: How about a footnote here to remind players that use of Kai-surge incurs loss of 1 EP?]
[ik: Do we also need to add that Kai-surge can only be used if you have more than 6 EP? Or we add a footnote to the description of Psi-surge and Kai-surge. Then we don't have to add footnotes to each and every individual numbered section. Footnotes hurt the flow of reading. Therefore we should use them sparingly in numbered sections.]
[jb: I agree that footnotes here seem to be overkill. Additionally, Joe may not have intended it to follow the same rules as Kai-surge used in combat.]
(er)187:snowslide [Is this OK?]
[bk: According to Merriam Webster, this word is attested as far back as 1841. <http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/snowslide> ]
(er)190:a massive hammer blow -> massive hammer blows [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: Since the sentence opens "It is as if all three have been felled simultaneously" and you've only launched one psychic attack, I think it's reasonable to imagine a single truly massive hammer hitting all 3 of them at once.]
(ft)190:[DED: How about a footnote here to remind players that use of Kai-surge incurs loss of 1 EP?]
[ik: Do we also need to add that Kai-surge can only be used if you have more than 6 EP? Or we add a footnote to the description of Psi-surge and Kai-surge. Then we don't have to add footnotes to each and every individual numbered section. Footnotes hurt the flow of reading. Therefore we should use them sparingly in numbered sections.]
[jb: I agree that footnotes here seem to be overkill. Additionally, Joe may not have intended it to follow the same rules as Kai-surge used in combat.]
(er)206, 337:Gaz rekenarim! [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: Should this be 'Gaza' or 'Gazim' to agree in number with 'rekenarim'?]
[jb: Interesting question. I don't know. I'm not aware of any examples that could guide us. Anyone want to compile an exhaustive list of all published uses of Giak? ;) ]
[bk: According to the MC, modifiers should be given after the noun, which isn't the case here. Example 3 on MC:74 has the phrase "shada shegtar" and not "shada shegtara" for "dwarf soldiers", so Giak behaves like English in that adjectives don't agree in number with the nouns they modify. So I propose: Gaz rekenarim -> Rekenarim gaz.]
[so: ]FYI, here are the occurrences of "gaz" in the books:
10tdot 52: Gaz darg! Gaz aga kuzim! Okim der tagog!
12tmod 126: Jeg dok! Dok narg gaz dik!
12tmod 169: Gaz muzar ok ruzzar! Shada egina gag!
12tmod 248: Okak gaz egor!
12tmod 291: Gaz dik!
15tdc 57: Gazim!
15tdc 206: Gaz rekenarim! Gaz rekenarim!
15tdc 337: Gaz rekenarim! Gaz rekenarim!]
[jb: I've been chewing on this, and I think we shouldn't become the Giak grammar police. In the game world, I doubt Giaks paid much attention to grammar as long as the boneheaded spawn next to him got the drift, so freeform grammar would be expected. In the real world, I think the Magnamund Companion laid down rules that seem to have been routinely violated from Flight from the Dark onward (of course, the MC was published later than FFtD, but you get the idea). So I think we shouldn't get in the business of correcting something that could be seen as colloquial Giak.]
(er)211:he grips it first time -> he grips it the first time [Rahenna, 1 Dec 2009]
[so: No; this must be a UK-centric idiom because it is written exactly how we would use the term in Britain.]
(ft)221:If you discover that your answer is wrong, or if you cannot solve the puzzle [Sasha Cooper: The text this option leads to shows Lone Wolf giving up - it seems a bit strange not to allow more than one try.]
[jb: It does seem strange, but it's hard to argue against explicitly stated directions. In reality, if it bothers a reader enough, they'll just ignore the directions and try again.
(er)227:minutes pass, then a -> minutes pass; then a [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)236:run foul -> run afoul
[jb: this idiom is OK as-is. Here's what dictionary.com has: "40. run foul / afoul of, to come into collision or controversy with: to run foul of the press." (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/foul)]
(er)241:an Arrow, then you -> an Arrow; then you [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
(er)260:nighted -> benighted
[bk: If "nighted" is good enough for Keats, it's good enough for us <http://www.bartleby.com/126/53.html> ]
[tp: I'm not sure "drear-nighted" (in a poem, no less) and "nighted" are necessarily comparable. But Wiktionary says that "nighted" is a legitimate word, and without the "educationally-deprived" meaning that "benighted" also has.]
[so: See also <http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/nighted>.]
(er)270:+4 -> +3 [JD: Consistent with just being a reminder about the standard bonus?]
[jb: sigh* Reject. ;) ]
(er)280:leap out and seizes him. -> leaps out and seizes him. [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[bk: I think we've agreed that when a specific number is mentioned (in this case a trio), it should be left in the plural.]
(er)296:You detect they are somewhere -> You detect he is somewhere [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007]
[jb: Yeah, this is used as a singular when the gender is unknown, so it's OK as-is. See Wikipedia's entry on using "they" as a singluar: <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Singular_they>]
(er)296:someone is nearby. You can tell that they are -> someone is nearby. You can tell that he is [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: (or) -> someone is nearby who is]
(er)322:you ship the oars -> you unship the oars [LeRoy McSwain Feb 2007: dictionary.com defines 'ship' as 'To place (an oar) in a resting position inside a boat without removing it from the oarlock.']
[so: Disagree; another definition is "to place (an oar) in proper position for rowing"]

Errata