2: Slaughter Mountain Run
| Pending |
| Fixed (Errata) | ||
| (er) | Many: | on to -> onto (REJECTED: 160, 312 [press on to]; 220 [lock on to]) (FIXED: 199, 251, 318 [jump onto]; 212, 264 [leaps onto]; 5, 103 [over onto]; 154 [onto dry land]; 207, 227 [contents onto]; 74, 114, 283, 317, 329 [back onto]; 162 [tipped onto]; 178 [turn onto]) |
| (er) | Dateline to Destruction: | Hijack, Assassination and Violent Opposition Consortium. -> Hijack, Assassination, and Violent Opposition Consortium. [LM] |
| (er) | Dateline to Destruction [x2]: | USSR and -> USSR, and |
| (er) | Dateline to Destruction: | cable and -> cable, and |
| (er) | Dateline To Destruction: | destined to be neutralized and dismantled -> slated to be neutralized and dismantled [LM: It wasn't their destiny if they were stolen] |
| (er) | Dateline To Destruction: | declare emergency -> declare an emergency [LM] |
| (er) | The Story So Far: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | The Story So Far: | in spite of the many perils you faced, perhaps because -> ? in spite of the many perils you faced, or perhaps because [lm: OR in spite of the many perils you faced--perhaps because (as per 03toz)] |
| (er) | The Story So Far: | 2012, that -> 2012 that |
| (er) | The Game Rules: | adventure you -> adventure, you |
| (er) | The Game Rules: | on to -> onto |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | motocycles and -> motorcycles, and |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | shotguns and -> shotguns, and |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | reflexes and -> reflexes, and |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | education and -> education, and |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | tested, therefore -> tested; therefore [LM] |
| (er) | Rules For Close Combat: | This procedure continues until the ENDURANCE points of either the enemy or Cal Phoenix are reduced to zero, at which point the one whose score is zero is declared dead. If Cal Phoenix is dead, the adventure is over. If the enemy is dead, Cal Phoenix proceeds but with a reduced ENDURANCE point score. -> This procedure continues until the ENDURANCE points of either the enemy or Cal Phoenix are reduced to zero or below, at which point that combatant is declared dead. If Cal Phoenix is dead, the adventure is over. If the enemy is dead, Cal Phoenix proceeds but with his ENDURANCE points possibly reduced. |
| (er) | Equipment: | Canteen and -> Canteen, and |
| (er) | Equipment: | radioactivity) and -> radioactivity), and |
| (er) | Equipment: | [so: Items in Initial Caps instead of ALL CAPS.] |
| (er) | 1: | roadbuses -> road-buses [so: Or, "road buses"] [JDu: I like Simon's proposal here.] [bk: I like your alternative.] |
| (er) | 4, 49, 62, 107, 143, 347: | blood-stained -> bloodstained |
| (er) | 8: | monumentous -> monumental [irs: monumentous isn't in the dictionary] |
| (er) | 8: | If you do not have one, or have exhausted your ammunition, -> If you do not have one, have exhausted your ammunition, or do not wish to use it |
| (er) | 12 [x2], 111, 150 [x2], 175, 224, 296: | camp fire -> campfire |
| (er) | 20: | Allamore -> Allamoore [lm: mapquest] |
| (er) | 21: | back-handed -> backhanded |
| (er) | 21: | by your punch, therefore -> by your punch; therefore |
| (er) | 22, 45: | Backpack item -> Backpack Item |
| (er) | 23: | "you raise your weapon and unleash a round of fire at the door." -> "you raise your weapon and fire at the door." [irs: If you are using a machine pistol, this would be 6 rounds, not 1.] |
| (er) | 24: | taught -> taut [NM] |
| (er) | 27, 38, 279, 319: | breach -> breech [NM] |
| (er) | 32, 97: | draw a weapon -> draw a missile weapon |
| (er) | 32: | do so he is -> do so, he is |
| (er) | 33: | sleeve; ‘that -> sleeve, ‘that |
| (er) | 38: | manouevre -> manoeuvre |
| (er) | 39: | nosedives into the hollow and pitches the car end-over-end -> nosedives into the hollow, pitching the car end-over-end |
| (er) | 43: | Smith and Wesson -> Smith & Wesson [NM] |
| (er) | 45: | says Kate, and starts -> says Kate, and she starts |
| (er) | 52: | Freeway 10 -> Interstate 10 |
| (er) | 56: | Footnote clarifying 3EP/missed Drink? [NM] [SO: take three Drinks or lose 9 ENDURANCE points. -> take three Drinks (or lose 3 ENDURANCE points per drink missed). -- cf. 01hh Section 222] |
| (er) | 58: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 66: | out-run -> outrun [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 79: | However, the first thing you see as you push the cover from the hole are scores of running, booted feet. -> However, the first things you see as you push the cover from the hole are scores of running, booted feet. [bk: Ah, back to plurals :) I'd say Accept, since "thing" and "are" certainly don't agree with each other!] |
| (er) | 81, 243, 309: | pack of clansmen, fifty riders strong, roar -> pack of clansmen, fifty riders strong, roars [lm: cf. ref. 195] |
| (er) | 81, 195, 243, 309, 329: | fifty less -> fifty fewer [bk] |
| (er) | 84, 210: | ace of spades emblem -> ace-of-spaces emblem [so: cf. 02smr "globe-of-the-world emblem" (16, 241), but also "ace of spades emblem" (30, 82, 210); 06tkot "toa tree emblem" (137); 23mh "tiger's head emblem" (84), "eagle's head emblem" (159), but also "eagle's-head emblem" (167, 256); 24rw "circle-and-star" emblem (102); 25totw "blazing sun emblem" (109, 122); 28thos "tiger's-head emblem" (84), but also "tiger's head emblem" (117, 256).] [JDu: Hmm - I personally prefer the non-hyphenated version (I don't think I would have thought to hyphenate something like this if I were writing.) I guess it comes down to clarity - but I think I would probably use quotes rather than a hyphen if there was an issue with clarity (ducks for cover!).] [bk: Agree. I guess hyphenate all of them, then.] |
| (er) | 89: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 90, 101: | dismantle, cut, re-align and weld -> dismantle, cut, re-align, and weld |
| (er) | 96: | bow string -> bowstring [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 110, 196, 340: | crack [so: onomatopoeia?] [so: Is referring to the sound/noise, not to a gap, so definitely onomatopoeia.] |
| (er) | 112, 152, 264: | new-found -> newfound |
| (er) | 117: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 121: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 133: | Coupe -> Coupé |
| (er) | 133, 344: | woodsmoke -> wood smoke |
| (er) | 133: | Footnote clarifying 3EP/missed Drink? [NM] [SO: take 2 Drinks or lose 6 ENDURANCE points -> take two Drinks or lose 3 ENDURANCE points per drink missed] |
| (er) | 133, 211, 274, 304, 344: | [nm: Is a telescope no good?] [so: Following section refers to lenses.] [jb: I vote to add "or a Telescope". I just realized that this implies changes all over the book, not just this section. You can't get a telescope in this book, so does anyone know of a reason you wouldn't be able to carry over a Telescope from the previous book? We could always change Telescope to Binoculars in the previous book...] [so: Actually, all other references to Telescope in Books 3 and 4 allow its use instead of Binoculars (cf. 03toz: 289, 332; 04cc: 96, 115, 300).] [jb: 'Fix this and the references.'] |
| (er) | 139: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 143: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 144: | your last few remaining bullets -> your bullets [lm: The second choice in ref 144 seems to me to be worded awkwardly. The first choice is basicly: do you wish to give Kate six bullets. The third is: do you wish to give Kate no bullets. In context, the second seems to mean: do you have a quantity of bullets fewer than six that you are willing to give Kate. Therefore, the bullets referred to in ref. 229 are not necessarily the last remaining bullets.] [jb: It seems pretty clear that the choice in 144 means that you give Kate all of the rest of your bullets, but we can make it clearer by changing "give them to Kate" to "give all of them to Kate".] |
| (er) | 157: | despatches -> dispatches [also despatch in 28, 328] |
| (er) | 160: | A large contingent have been shadowing the convoy and are -> A large contingent has been shadowing the convoy and they are [bk: Hmm. Absent the preceding sentence, I'd say go with "A large contingent has been shadowing the convoy and is". But the subject is implicitly "A large contingent [of Maverick clansmen]", which would make our <collective> of <plural> rule apply. Unsure.] [so: What about a small change to make implicit the group we're talking about? Something like "large contingent -> large contingent of them"? Then we could leave the rest of the sentence unchanged. Or should we rather just leave this as-is?] |
| (er) | 167: | that were it not for the line of shattered telegraph poles that run parallel to the road you would -> that, were it not for the line of shattered telegraph poles that run parallel to the road, you would [NM] [bk: Reject the first comma; the phrase isn't a parenthetical because if we removed it there would be nothing to oppose "you would". Undecided about the second comma.] |
| (er) | 168: | colony are -> colony is [bk: Given the singular vs. plural tally for "colony", I vote for making all the uses singular there, even though some of them violate our rules.] |
| (er) | 168: | truck -> trunk [Jesse Goodell: Based on the context, Cal should be inspecting the damaged 'trunk' referred to in Section 24. The error is also in the original.] [jb: Agreed. Cal is driving around a roadster which now has a damaged trunk. He's not driving a truck.] |
| (er) | 169: | in frustration, ‘I can't -> in frustration. ‘I can't |
| (er) | 177: | If you do not possess a missile weapon, or have insufficient ammunition, -> If you do not possess a missile weapon, have insufficient ammunition, or do not wish to use it, |
| (er) | 187: | [irs: In previous section (332) you lost your pistol, can it be reclaimed?] [jb: Hmm. Well the section does say "You are in too much pain to try to attempt a burial and, mindful of the time you have lost already, you make only a brief search of the bodies." And you can take a Pistol and Machine Pistol from the bodies. So I'm leaning toward no, but that's just my opinion. Thoughts?] [jb: Taking a second look at this, I can see the other side. It seems reasonable that Cal could pick up his weapon even if he only has time to make a cursory search of the bodies. Should we add a footnote or something to the text? "You may also retrieve the weapon that the clansman shot out of your hands."] |
| (er) | 190, 270: | at who -> at whom [tp: Agreed.] [bk: Agreed.] |
| (er) | 190, 236, 270, 275: | bang -> <i>bang</i> [so: 3 instances of <onomatopoeia>bang</onomatopoeia> occur in 15tdc; no other instances are italicised. Affects a number of other books.] [jb: Bang can definitely be an onomatopoeia. It's one of the most cited examples. I think it works here] |
| (er) | 191: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 194: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 200: | If you do not possess a missile weapon, or have insufficient ammunition for one round of fire, -> If you do not possess a missile weapon, have insufficient ammunition for one round of fire, or do not wish to use it, |
| (er) | 217: | line, and the sheer force of the rushing wind whipping around the end of the rifle's barrel, make -> line and the sheer force of the rushing wind whipping around the end of the rifle's barrel make [so: Or, "line--and the sheer force of the rushing wind whipping around the end of the rifle's barrel--make] |
| (er) | 219: | Then, when the number of Mexican clansmen on guard are at their fewest -> Then, when the Mexican clansmen on guard are at their fewest [bk: Or, "are at their fewest -> is at its fewest" ("number" is a singular abstract concept, not a collection).] |
| (er) | 245: | is awesome; he is -> is awesome: he is [bk: Accept. Second half elaborates on the first half.] |
| (er) | 268: | If you do not possess a missile weapon, or do not have sufficient ammunition to use it, -> If you do not possess a missile weapon, do not have sufficient ammunition to use it, or do not wish to use it, |
| (er) | 268: | dispairing -> despairing |
| (er) | 276: | perception -> Perception [NM] |
| (er) | 277: | angry read weal -> angry red weal |
| (er) | 281: | For two days and nights the town is hit by lightning storms and tornadoes, forcing you to remain in the basement of the motel. It is not until the morning of the sixth day of your mission that the tornadoes blow themselves out and you are able to leave the town in safety. -> All day and all night the town is hit by lightning storms and tornadoes, forcing you to remain in the basement of the motel. It is not until the morning of the sixth day of your mission that the tornadoes blow themselves out and you are able to leave the town in safety. [lm: The convoy breaks out of Big Spring prior to daybreak and that morning Cal drives south to San Angelo, arriving at dusk. He spends the night in the basement of the Sears Megamarket. On Day 2, Cal rescues Kate and escapes from San Angelo. They spend that night in Eldorado [or fall asleep while driving through the night and crash]. The next day [day three], Cal and Kate drive to Bakersfield. They spend that night in the library there. On day four, they reach Fort Stockton and meet the WDL soldiers. At the beginning of ref 281, it mentions that the weather detiorates at dawn the following morning which would be day 5. So, two days and two nights of bad weather would mean that the heroes cannot leave until the morning of day seven. If it is day seven, however, that throws off the arrival at Kent which happens on day 6, i.e. the day prior to the scheduled rendez-vous with the convoy on day seven. It as well throws off the statement in ref. 350 that the adventure lasted one week. Amending the bad weather to one day and night rather than day 6 to day 7 therefore seems to me the best fix.] |
| (er) | 282: | If you do not possess a missile weapon, or lack sufficient ammunition to use it, -> If you do not possess a missile weapon, lack sufficient ammunition to use it, or do not wish to use it, |
| (er) | 286: | in your hand, causes the -> in your hand causes the |
| (er) | 287: | bow string -> bowstring [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 290: | Sterling county line -> Sterling County line [NM] [so: A quick Google search backs up this proposal.] |
| (er) | 293: | Freeway 20 -> Interstate 20 |
| (er) | 299: | someobody -> somebody |
| (er) | 308: | [nm: "a" choice? As in only one item?] [SO: a choice from -> a choice of (since there is no reason why Cal may take only one item from the list.)] |
| (er) | 311: | Loxoscees reclusa -> Loxosceles Reclusa |
| (er) | 312: | Freeway 20 -> Interstate 20 [bk: this one's particularly bad because he then immediately says "Interstate 10"] |
| (er) | 315: | North Gate -> north gate |
| (er) | 315: | 161 -> 102 |
| (er) | 315: | 207 -> 227 |
| (er) | 317: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 318: | You discard your weapon [lm: Is 'discard' the best word here; you still have the weapon,right?] [jb: Yeah, I'm imagining Cal dropping it on the seat next to him. Change it to "You set your weapon aside"?] |
| (er) | 320: | (This is in addition to the 1 point you gain automatically through the use of a Medi-kit unit.) [lm: Is this the first time this rule is mentioned?] [so: 1 point -> 3 points; cf. The Mide-kit section of Equipment.] |
| (er) | 329: | pack, fifty riders strong, roar -> pack, fifty riders strong, roars |
| (er) | 329: | the pack are -> the pack is [bk: Hmm. Joe seems to go between singular and plural in this section. See "the pack... roars" a couple of sentences earlier. Undecided. However, I suggest: "fifty less -> fifty fewer".] [so: Let's go with "pack is" to agree with "pack...roars". Also, "pack is" is used elsewhere in the book, but this is the only occurrence of "pack are".] |
| (er) | 330: | half-way -> halfway [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 332: | botton -> bottom |
| (er) | 338: | If you possess an HE Grenade, turn to 314. [lm: no option to not use?] |
| (er) | 339: | close combat skill [lm: small caps] |
| (er) | 340: | barge it -> barge into it [lm: I've forgotten. What did we decide last time?] [so: "barge -> barge into" as per 25totw 16 and 303 errata.] |
| (er) | 345: | If you possess a Leviathan Missile, turn to 120. If you do not possess this weapon, turn to 219. -> (It's a Backpack Item, right?) |
| (er) | 346: | checkered vs. chequered [irs: switch to English spelling, or keep American?] |
| (er) | 346: | If you possess none of these items, -> If you possess none of these items or do not wish to use them, |
| (er) | 346: | you raise your gun [lm: (in 163) You don't necessarily have a missile weapon or ammunition.] [jb: he missile weapon is pretty integral to this section. Later in the section: "Immediately the two guards come rushing forward to investigate, and, as they appear outside the locker room, you raise your gun and fire. (Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.) ... The Angelino survives your gunfire and leaps through the doorway to kick your weapon from your hands." Without doing a big rewrite, I think the best option is to make a missile weapon required to get to 163 by changing the choice in 346 to read "If you possess a Siren and a missile weapon and wish to use them, turn to 163."] |
| (er) | 350: | Mad Dog Michigan, and an -> Mad Dog Michigan and an [bk: Accept.] |
| (er) | Combat Rules Summary: | or below, this is -> or below; this is |
| Small Illustrations | ||
| small 1 | Convoy 1 (Pickup, 2 buses); Convoy 2 (HGV, bus, roadster) | 1 |
| small 2 | Code Wheel | 129 |
| small 3 | Freeway Warrior badge | The Story So Far, 350 |
| small 4 | Playing Card (Ace of Spades) | 30, 82, 210 |
| small 5 | Cityscape | 153, 288 |
| small 6 | Biker in rear-view mirror | 74 251 |
| small 7 | Mountains & cacti | 69 250 300 |
| small 8 | Crashed motorcycle; Highway 10 | 308 |
| small 9 | Deserted gas station | 110, 196, 267 |
| small 10 | Revolver, skeletal hand | 14, 31, 117, 151, 170, 198, 235, 247, 263, 278, 297, 322 |
| small 11 | Bikers | 200 |
| small 12 | Yucca | 134 |
| Fixed (Not Errata) | ||
| (ne) | Title: | Finalise text for Brian Williams fw.inc file [Brian Williams was first noticed by Joe Dever for his work in White Dwarf magazine (circa issue 50) and the Real Life Gamebooks series by Jon Sutherland and Simon Farrell. Brian Williams was Joe's first choice of illustrators to replace Gary Chalk on the Lone Wolf series. Brian also illustrated three of the four books in Joe Dever's Freeway Warrior series.] |
| (ne) | The Story So Far: | his brother--Stinger and -> "his brother--Stinger--and" [NM] |
| (ft) | Equipment: | [Do you get to pick new items in Book 2 if you completed Book 1? What about Water Canteen, Medikits, replacement Hunting Knife? Do I restore ENDURANCE to starting level? (see: this(approve sites) forum thread.] [lm: I assumed that I begin with a full canteen, the random number of medikits, a missile weapon and ammo, in addition to that which I concluded book one with.] [jb: I don't see any reason to go either way although the Survival Skills sections at least make it clear that you at least get to keep your existing equipment. From Highway Holocaust: "These additional points, together with any equipment and provisions that you possess at the end of Book 1, may then be used in the next Freeway Warrior adventure, which is called Slaughter Mountain Run." At best, I think we can give a tentatively worded footnote along the lines of the following: "If you have already completed the previous Freeway Warrior adventure in Highway Holocaust, it is unclear whether you may replenish your supplies before starting this adventure or whether you can only carry over the supplies you carried at the end of the previous adventure. It seems reasonable that you would be able to restock your supplies while in Big Spring before setting off for El Paso."] |
| (ne) | Rules For Close Combat: | CLOSE COMBAT SKILL [encode as attribute] |
| (ne) | Rules For Close Combat: | [LM: link from <close combat> leads to <numbered sections> not section 1] |
| (ne) | 18: | [so: Remove superfluous link to Section 260] |
| (ne) | 21: | slice; -> slice, [NM] |
| (ft) | 44: | Using the Medi-Kit does not restore ENDURANCE [NM] [SO: Use of this Medi-kit does not restore any ENDURANCE points in this instance.] |
| (ft) | 52: | [so: requires a footnote: 'This is the correct answer to the security valve puzzle in Section 129.'] |
| (ne) | 75: | lf -> If |
| (ne) | 83: | tbe -> the |
| (ne) | 108: | [so: should link to Section 260 (link broken)] |
| (ne) | 131: | 86 -> 86. |
| (ft) | 138: | "Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch." [lm: This footnote ought to be removed. In the circumstances, Cal is not using his own weapon but one he picked up and is firing the rounds loaded in it. Cal does not necessarily have any ammunition of his own here. When he given the opportunity to keep the Pistol, the fired round is taken into account i.e. it has three rounds as opposed to four in parallel reference 146.] |
| (ne) | 175: | [so: choice 1 should link to Section 65 (link broken)] |
| (ne) | 176: | midburst -> mid-burst |
| (er) | 233: | reach automatically for a missile weapon [lm: You don't necessarily have a missile weapon or ammunition.] [jb: We'd also need to alter "As you ease off the safety catch, you contemplate your next move." and make a gun required to go to 35 where you shoot at the clansman. This one's even harder to fix because there doesn't seem to be a clean way to require a gun to get to 233. Footnote?] [so: Footnote added to 233: "It is possible that you may not be carrying a missile weapon at this point. This is a game-design issue that cannot be easily rectified." Copied directly from 01hh 305.] |
| (ne) | 276: | and to it -> and add to it |
| (ne) | 341: | l000cc engine -> 1000cc engine |
| (ne) | 346: | [so: choice 2 should link to Section 89 (link broken)] |
| (ne) | Footnotes: | Numbering incorrect due to repetition of "1" in game rules and Section 4 [NM] |
| Rejected | ||
| (er) | The Story So Far: | shock wave -> shockwave |
| (er) | The Story So Far, 1, 14, 24, 52, 58, 312: | Gasolene-> Gasoline [NM] [SO: Jon says to leave "gasolene" alone.] |
| (er) | The Story So Far: | it was decided that, -> it was decided that [NM] [bk: Reject. Both of the two phrases that follow are parenthetical so should be set off with commas.] |
| (er) | 6: | Woolen Mills -> Woollen Mills [so: Nope, this is actually correct.] |
| (er) | 8: | Sonora caverns -> Sonora Caverns [irs: Disagree, the official title is 'Caverns of Sonora' (see 174, 247), I think this is fine as it is, or should maybe be simply 'caverns'] [jb: Leave as-is.] |
| (er) | 28, 87, 284, 313: | Christoval bridge -> Christoval Bridge [irs: disagree, doesn't look like a named bridge, rather an unnamed bridge to a named place] [jb: Leave as-is.] |
| (er) | 38, 179: | round; maximum -> round, maximum [so: This is the style adopted across the series in these situations.] |
| (ne) | 45, 73, 75, 133: | [nm: ellipsis formatting?] [SO: That's the new style as described in the gamebook.dtd files and related .mod files] |
| (er) | 66: | The enemy are -> The enemy is [bk: Reject. (Repeated use of 3rd-person pl. pronouns).] |
| (er) | 69: | dusty little -> dusty, little [jb: <http://www.fortunecity.com/bally/durrus/153/gramch21.html> Here's the relevant part: "In addition, defining adjectives, proper adjectives, and adjectives indicating color and materials are usually not preceded by commas. In the following examples, adjectives of these types are underlined. e.g. a large egg carton a beautiful Chinese vase elegant black boots a dilapidated stone building] |
| (er) | 76, 106, 153, 288: | megamarket -> mega-market [JDu: Looks a good change to me.] [bk:He's using the term to describe Sears, which in the US we'd call a department store. (We'd only use the term "megamarket", regardless of punctuation, to describe a very large supermarket.) How do people in the UK use the term?] [so: <http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/megamarket>.] [cn: Given the context it seems logical what is meant - if supermarket is a large market, then a megamarket must be a very large market. It also adds that whole futurish aspect to the sentence - in the future we dont have supermarkets we have megamarkets! (well right up to the apocalypse anyway). If you can find a word that implies all that then swap it.] [bk: But Joe specifically identifies it as Sears (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sears ), which any American knows is a department store. My issue is more with applying the word "megamarket" to Sears than using it in general. Imagine if the setting were a future UK and he said you took shelter under a "Debenhams Megamarket"...] [JDu: I think Hypermarket is in reasonably common usage to mean bigger than a supermarket?] [DD: hypermarket" is a term, I think, coined in the 1960s(?) to describe large out-of-town (e.g. on a ring-road) supermarkets, although I think it is more generally one that was used by geography teachers and town planners rather than ordinary people.] [jb: Megamarket is OK.] |
| (er) | **115: | queueing -> queuing [Should this have been fixed? cf. TMOD Section 295 + Errata entry] [irs: change somehow made it into errata entry despite being rejected in section text - removed] |
| (er) | 127: | crouch either side ->? crouch on either side [so: Idiomatic, but correct.] |
| (er) | 133: | ’99 Mercedes Malibu Coupé ->? ’99 Mercedes Malibu Coupe (per book). [lm: I couldn't find results for 'Coupé on google] [so: See Wikipedia. Since we are using élite, we should definitely use Coupé.] |
| (er) | 141: | scrunch [onomatopoeia] [??] |
| (er) | 153: | soft red ->? soft, red [jb: <http://www.fortunecity.com/bally/durrus/153/gramch21.html> Here's the relevant part: "In addition, defining adjectives, proper adjectives, and adjectives indicating color and materials are usually not preceded by commas. In the following examples, adjectives of these types are underlined. e.g. a large egg carton a beautiful Chinese vase elegant black boots a dilapidated stone building] |
| (er) | 246: | unbeknown -> unbeknownst [??] [irs: Unnecessary] |
| (ft) | 271: | [nm: Maybe footnote here should instruct to deduct TWELVE rounds, not six (firing twice).] [SO: It doesn't specifically say so, so it's best to leave it.] |
| (er) | 279: | one burst; maximum -> one burst, maximum [so: This is the style adopted across the series in these situations.] |