| |
1: Highway Holocaust
| Fixed |
| (er) | Many: | red indian vs. red Indian vs. Red Indian - affects 155, 209 (x2), 298, 300 (x2) [jb: Red Indian] |
| (er) | Many: | indian vs. Indian - affects ill2 (caption), 30, 38, 321 [jb: Indian] |
| (er) | Many: | [JD: style issue: sulphonamides is a now-outdated British spelling. Most British chemists have joined the rest of the world in using the spelling sulfonamides.]
[jb: I don't necessarily want to update the text to current usage. Preserving the text in their historic context is important and will only get more important as time passes.]
[jd: clarification: even when the story is set, most Brit has swapped the ph for an f. I suspect it's a holdover from when Mr. Dever was in school/university, during the 1960's and 70's, at which time the ph was more common.]
[jb: I'll buy it. Please change it to "f".] |
| (er) | Many: | <blah>, then -> <blah>, and then [or, <blah; then (where appropriate)] [jb: Because of the magnitude of this change, its controversial nature, the fact that the passages are still understandable, and the impending publication, I feel we should postpone this until later.]
[Affects: The Story So Far, 5, 13, 30, 42, 71, 89 [x2], 90, 99, 116, 121, 124, 131, 135 [x2], 140, 145, 146, 154, 162, 202, 205, 212, 220, 237, 238, 239, 244, 247, 256, 265, 266, 268, 286, 288, 300,302, 316, 324, 325, 329, 340] |
| (er) | Title: | Finalise text for Mel Grant inc file [SO][LM] |
| (er) | Title: | the freeway warrior -> the Freeway Warrior [JD: it seems to be used as a title] [jb: agreed. already fixed?] |
| (er) | Title: | (i have no idea what 'origins' is) [LM] |
| (er) | Dateline to Disaster: | Hijack, Assassination and Violent Opposition Consortium. -> Hijack, Assassination, and Violent Opposition Consortium. [LM] |
| (er) | Dateline to Disaster [x2]: | USSR and -> USSR, and [SO][LM] |
| (er) | Dateline to Disaster: | cable and -> cable, and [SO][LM] |
| (er) | Dateline to Disaster: | destined to be neutralized and dismantled -> slated to be neutralized and dismantled (it wasn't their destiny if they were stolen) [LM] |
| (er) | Dateline to Disaster: | declare emergency -> declare an emergency [LM] |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | workshops and -> workshops, and |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | shelter and -> shelter, and |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | brothers and -> brothers, and |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | gas and -> gas, and |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | posts and -> posts, and |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | Sierra Nevada mountains -> Sierra Nevada Mountains
[jb: "Sierra Nevada Mountains" is redundant like "PIN number". I'm no native speaker, but "Sierra Nevada" translates roughly to "snowy mountain range". So "snowy mountain range mountains" isn't kosher. If anything, this should be "mountains of the Sierra Nevada".] |
| (er) | Dateline to Disaster: | training and -> training, and [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | Tuscon colony -> Tucson colony |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | fuel, food or water -> fuel, food, or water [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | before 'the Day' -> before 'The Day' [If we are keeping original style there's a fix needed in DtD] |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | It was a month after 'the Day' -> It was a month after 'The Day' |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | 'the Day' -> 'The Day' [x3] |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | Waco. For, -> Waco, for [LM] |
| (er) | The Game Rules: | adventure you -> adventure, you [SO][LM] |
| (er) | The Game Rules: | On pages 6 and 7 you will find an Action Chart -> [so: reword this] [irs: changed to 'An Action Chart has been supplied'] |
| (er) | The Game Rules: | on to -> onto |
| (er) | The Game Rules: | For ease of use during play it is recommended that you photocopy these pages. [so: remove this.] |
| (er) | The Game Rules: | Random Number Table at the back of this book -> Random Number Table |
| (er) | Survival skills: | survival skills vs. Survival Skills [so: both are used in this section] |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | motocycles and -> motorcycles, and [SO][LM] |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | shotguns and -> shotguns, and [SO][LM] |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | reflexes and -> reflexes, and [SO][LM] |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | education and -> education, and [SO][LM] |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | tested, therefore -> tested; therefore [LM] |
| (er) | Equipment: | Canteen and -> Canteen, and [SO][LM] |
| (er) | Equipment: | radioactivity) and -> radioactivity), and [SO][LM] |
| (er) | Equipment: | H.E. (High Explosive) GRENADE [so: I thought these were all going to be changed from H.E. to HE?] |
| (er) | Equipmnt: | potassium iodine -> potassium iodide [JD: almost certainly <er> in the original, as it's an easy mistake to make] |
| (er) | Equipmnt: | C.B. [see H.E. vs. HE] [jb: CB] |
| (er) | Equipment: | Canteen and -> Canteen, and |
| (er) | Equipment: | radioactivity) and -> radioactivity), and |
| (er) | Rules For Close Combat: | on the inside back cover of the book. [so: remove] |
| (er) | 2, 131: | <small illustration> [LM: dc1 has not yet reached freeway 20]
[SO: Mix-up in small illustration file names 12 <-> 11.] |
| (er) | 3, 78, 103, 105, 127, 144, 160, 169, 173, 181, 188, 196, 213, 295, 297, 299, 303, 315, 321: | on to -> onto |
| (er) | 5: | The death of their brother, and the noise and fury of your weapon, brings -> The death of their brother and the noise and fury of your weapon bring [LM] |
| (er) | 18, 42, 96, 195: | zig-zag -> zigzag |
| (er) | 20: | click [so: encode as onomatopoeia] |
| (er) | 20: | silver and titanium -> silver, and titanium [LM] |
| (er) | 22: | Two miles north, along the Jacksboro Highway -> Two miles northwest, along the Jacksboro Highway (cf mapquest) [LM] |
| (er) | 22: | murderously chilling -> chilling [??]
[jb: I'm not sure what this language is supposed to mean, but "murderously" seems to add flavor.] |
| (er) | 23: | Backpack items -> Backpack Items |
| (er) | 23: | Then the front line of bikers open fire -> Then the front line of bikers opens fire [LM] |
| (er) | 28: | shoulder, flick the safety and take -> shoulder, flick the safety, and take [LM] |
| (er) | 29: | equipment, fifty pounds of salt and the thick roll -> equipment, fifty pounds of salt, and the thick roll [LM] |
| (er) | 31, 80, 117, 218: | head first -> head-first [??] |
| (er) | 32: | If the fight lasts five rounds or more -> ??? If you win in five rounds or more [LM] |
| (er) | 36: | under way -> underway [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | 48, 294: | 'the Kickers' -> the 'Kickers' [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | 48: | Medi-kit, Ammo Pouch and Water Canteen -> Medi-kit, Ammo Pouch, and Water Canteen [LM] |
| (er) | 48, 294: | eyes, and -> eyes and [LM] |
| (er) | 58: | face, staggers drunkenly and then -> face, staggers drunkenly, and then [LM] |
| (er) | 60: | your Current Stealth -> your current Stealth [LM] |
| (er) | 63: | Weapons list -> Weapons List |
| (er) | 66: | First Aid Box -> first aid box [so: this isn't a Backpack Item] |
| (er) | 68: | 'the Mavericks' -> the 'Mavericks' [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | 77: | motor cycle -> motorcycle [LM] |
| (er) | 82: | [LM: This reference has Cal driving into the campus; refs. 144, 4, and 29 have him walking back to the convoy]
[SO: drive -> walk ??] |
| (er) | 83: | dive to the ground, roll over and then spring -> dive to the ground, roll over, and then spring [LM] |
| (er) | 89: | The glare of a dozen motorcycle headlights follow -> The glare of a dozen motorcycle headlights follows [LM] |
| (er) | 89: | and you go back -> ? and you look back [LM]
[jb: This is a confusing narrative, but it seems that Cal actually moves back toward the bus.]
[jb: Per Simon's suggestion: go back -> fall back] |
| (er) | 90: | the slightest, neither do -> ??? the slightest; neither do [LM] |
| (er) | 90: | lack of hair and -> lack of hair, and |
| (er) | 98: | there is loud click -> there is a loud click [LM] |
| (er) | 98: | silver and titanium -> silver, and titanium [LM] |
| (er) | 98: | click [IRS: encoded as onomatopoeia] |
| (er) | 100: | cheered -> cheers [LM] |
| (er) | 100: | brought -> brings [LM] |
| (er) | 100: | promised -> promises [LM] |
| (er) | 100: | were soon shattered -> are soon shattered [LM] |
| (er) | 103: | and soon their footfalls -> and soon its footfalls [LM] |
| (er) | 105: | 'the Day' -> 'The Day' |
| (er) | 107: | [+others?]: the first...reach -> the first...reaches |
| (er) | 108: | raise your pistol, take aim at the rider's chest and squeeze -> raise your pistol, take aim at the rider's chest, and squeeze [LM] |
| (er) | 109: | shift gear -> ?? shift gears [LM] |
| (er) | 116: | switch on and key -> switch on, and key [LM] |
| (er) | 119: | Water Canteen, containing -> Water Canteen containing [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | 122: | 'gutteral' -> 'guttural' |
| (er) | 127: | the fuel tank, axle and tyres -> the fuel tank, axle, and tyres [LM] |
| (er) | 132: | draw your gun, take aim and kill -> draw your gun, take aim, and kill [LM] |
| (er) | 133: | feet first -> feet-first [irs: if so, then also need changes in 04tcod, 05sots, 08tjoh, 11tpot, 17tdoi, 18dotd] [jb: feet-first - this is nuanced, see Manual of Style] |
| (er) | 136: | screams of their chief dispels -> screams of their chief dispel [LM] |
| (er) | 137: | south-west -> southwest [irs: other books would need changing for consistency] [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | 143: | Water Canteen, containing -> Water Canteen containing |
| (er) | 143: | blood-stained -> bloodstained |
| (er) | 156: | effects of the scorching heat and the poor road surface begins -> effects of the scorching heat and the poor road surface begin [LM] |
| (er) | 158: | check the setting and -> check the setting, and [LM] |
| (er) | 160: | 'the Day' -> 'The Day' |
| (er) | 162: | Weapons list -> Weapons List |
| (er) | 162: | once sophisticated technology -> once-sophisticated technology [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | 163: | weapons, ammunition and equipment -> weapons, ammunition, and equipment [LM] |
| (er) | 165, 318: | rear view -> rear-view [jb:a greed] |
| (er) | 173: | heat, exertion and fear -> heat, exertion, and fear [LM] |
| (er) | 175: | H.E. -> HE [so: maybe?] |
| (er) | 178: | what is causing the refraction -> what is causing the reflection [LM] |
| (er) | 181: | rope -> Rope |
| (er) | 182: | biker's raid -> bikers' raid [LM] |
| (er) | 188: | en route [foreign] |
| (er) | 195: | hellava -> helluva [cf. Sect95] |
| (er) | 196: | You leave Freeway 20 and travel cross-country in order to bypass Strawn. (according to mapquest, strawn is some distance north of freeway 20) [LM]
[jb: Google Maps agrees. "in order to give Strawn a wide berth"?] |
| (er) | 209: | his kind all of -> his kind, all of [LM] |
| (er) | 209: | first floor -> second floor [MB: depends on whether we're doing it American or Britishstyle... this has probably been discussed already... in the US we start numbering the ground floor as one, and the first floor above ground floor is two, rather than ground floor followed by first floor as in the UK] [IRS:Second floor would make sense in both English and American, but does it really need changing?][SO: While seemingly counter-intuitive, I agree that the text should reflect the British author, so I'd rather this not be changed.]
[jb: footnote?] |
| (er) | 210: | out-distance -> outdistance [so: as per PAMoS] |
| (er) | 219: | mixture, are -> mixture are |
| (er) | 220: | and 'll -> and'll |
| (er) | 222: | (or lose 6 ENDURANCE points) -> ??? (or lose 3 ENDURANCE points per drink missed) [LM] |
| (er) | 222: | a few hours sleep -> a few hours' sleep [or, a few hours of sleep] |
| (er) | 222: | single vehicle to -> single vehicle, to |
| (er) | 222: | seen, then -> seen, and then |
| (er) | 227: | Why you sly -> Why, you sly
[jb: I can see why this might be useful here, but is there a rule that can justify it?] |
| (er) | 228: | death cry -> death-cry [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 229: | [???: "...across the bridge. at a run." The first full-stop should be a comma.] [irs: Simply removed the period so text matches 23, 138, 260] |
| (er) | 229: | motor cycles -> motorcycles [LM] |
| (er) | 229, 260: | front line of bikers open fire -> front line of bikers opens fire [LM] |
| (er) | 229, 260: | 'It's ready!' shouts Kate, and takes off -> 'It's ready!' Kate shouts and takes off [LM] |
| (er) | 242: | Backpack item -> Backpack Item |
| (er) | 247: | Uncle Jonas, Kate and Hammer -> Uncle Jonas, Kate, and Hammer [LM] |
| (er) | 251: | out: Taint -> out, Taint [LM] |
| (er) | 253: | fix.' 'Use [so: New paragraph for new speaker.] |
| (er) | 257: | 'the Day' -> 'The day' |
| (er) | 257: | Strawn is the next town due west. (north according to mapquest) [LM]
[jb: Or perhaps northwest, depending on where on the freeway they are.] |
| (er) | 257: | 'It's six miles west o' here,' (north according to mapquest) [LM]
[jb: Or perhaps northwest, depending on where on the freeway they are.] |
| (er) | 259: | pistol -> Pistol [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | 265, 289: | camp fire -> campfire |
| (er) | 267: | Believe me, I know -> Believe me; I know [LM] |
| (er) | 270: | water canteen -> Water Canteen [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | 270: | Sabanna River -> Sabana River (cf. here) [LM] |
| (er) | 270: | unit). -> unit.) |
| (er) | 271: | A volley of shots ricochet -> A volley of shots ricochets [LM] |
| (er) | 273: | you whisper. 'I guess [Add paragraph break for new speaker] |
| (er) | 279: | EXIT--FIRE ESCAPE USE IN CASE OF EMERGENCY -> EXIT--FIRE ESCAPE USE IN CASE OF EMERGENCY ONLY (cf ref 334) [LM] |
| (er) | 285: | barely visible, the bus -> barely visible; the bus [LM] |
| (er) | 285: | A muffled boom and a plume of dust marks -> A muffled boom and a plume of dust mark [LM] |
| (er) | 286: | halt, then -> halt, and then [jb: halt then] |
| (er) | 287: | you point your pistol over your left shoulder [LM: is the steering wheel on the right side of the car? lol.]
[jb: Illustration 11 in 210 plainly shows the steering wheel on the left side of the car. I'll change this because I also can't imagine shooting over my left shoulder from the driver's (left) side of a car.] |
| (er) | 289: | impact, then -> impact, and then |
| (er) | 290: | click [IRS: encoded as onomatopoeia] |
| (er) | 299: | flood of squealing rats swarm -> flood of squealing rats swarms [LM] |
| (er) | 299: | and break -> and breaks [LM] |
| (er) | 300: | were young; books with -> were young, books with (OR) were young--books with [LM] |
| (er) | 304: | north, west and east -> north, west, and east [LM] |
| (er) | 305: | 'fininshed' -> 'finished' |
| (er) | 313: | handrails -> hand-rails [ik: as in the PAMoS] |
| (er) | 315: | roadster, switch on the ignition and -> roadster, switch on the ignition, and [LM] |
| (er) | 318: | who have managed -> who managed (past tense because they are wiped out now) [LM] |
| (er) | 318: | himself Mad Dog Michigan -> himself 'Mad Dog Michigan' [LM] |
| (er) | 318: | Until then they'd always been kept closely guarded, but while most of them were away I managed to steal a bike and escape. -> Until then the bikes'd always been kept closely guarded, but while most of them were away I managed to steal one and escape [LM] |
| (er) | 325: | derelict, decayed and deserted -> derelict, decayed, and deserted [LM] |
| (er) | 329: | Shooting, Stealth and Perception -> Shooting, Stealth, and Perception [LM] |
| (er) | 329: | cruel sneer -> a cruel sneer [IRS: Agree]] |
| (er) | 329: | smoke and dust that hovers -> smoke and dust that hover [LM] |
| (er) | 337: | The crowd grow -> The crowd grows [LM] |
| (er) | 343: | Shackelford county sheriffs -> Shackelford County Sheriff's |
| (er) | combat rules summary: | until one combatant has zero ENDURANCE points [so: zero or less?] [jb: zero or fewer - needs fixing in other books] [irs: changed to below, general consensus is this it is better than fewer] |
| Illustration Placements |
| small 1 | Cactus+mesa | [irs: added: CS, 232, 309] |
| small 2 | Dashboard+road | [irs: added: 22, 36, 160, 211, 295, 315] |
| small 3 | Rifle+shotgun | [irs: added: 26, 28, 40, 41, 72, 87, 111, 145, 159, 180, 191, 208, 214, 233, 264, 288, 334, 348] |
| small 4 | Walled town (DC1) | [irs: added: CS, 211] |
| small 5 | Freeway Warrior badge | [irs: added: CS] |
| small 6 | Boots, Shotgun, carts, jacket, Water Canteen | [irs: added: Equipment] |
| small 7 | 3 Bikers | [so: Section 23?, 138?, 229?, 247?, 260?] [irs: unsure: 23, 138, 229, 247, 260; suggest: 93, 284] |
| small 8 | Texas State sign | [irs: added: CS, 105, 160, 161] |
| small 9 | Lions flag | [irs: added: 135, 243, 332] |
| small 10 | Longhorn skull | [irs: added: 343] |
| small 11 | Highway 20 sign | [irs: added: 17, 93, 178, 182, 327] |
| small 12 | Machine Pistol | [irs: added: 2, 131] |
| Fixed (Not Errata) |
| Rescan illustrations at 16c greyscale |
| The page heading image seems to encroach upon some of the space where the text appears throughout; e.g. on the Dedication, the tops of the taller letters seem clipped. |
| Should the section number appear in the 'circle' top-right in the Header graphic rather than at the top of the text? |
| Is the appropriate syntax " <ch.ellips>" or "<ch.ellips>" [i.e. should there be a space preceding an ellipsis?][irs: there should normally be no preceding space] |
| All occurrences of - -> -- (i.e. <space><dash><space> -> <dash><dash>) (ne) [irs: should this be <ch.endash/>?] [jb: emdash. Use gbfixencoding.pl. |
| There are some editors missing: Iain Smith (unless coordination takes precedence) Ingo Klocker, Neil McGrory, and Mark Baumann. (Also, Nicholas Matzen reported an issue 30/10/2005) [jb: Add 'em. Although single issues reported generally merits the "Special Thanks" category. |
| Thomas also worked on the XML (see post 7/12/2005). [jb: add him] |
Souvenir font is used throughout instead of ZAPF Elliptical 711 (Melior substitution).
[jb: Needs adjustment in CSS. What are some other appropriate alternatives in case that font isn't available?]
[jb: What I'm asking for (not so clearly) is a list of preferred fonts in order of preference in case Zapf Elliptical 711 isn't installed on a user's computer.] |
The Small and Large Illustrations seems to have a strange 'double border' throughout.
[jb: need to create border images for use with the new style]
[jb: Someone (besides me :) ) needs to replace brdr*.gif with something appropriate for the new layout.] |
Using the offline EC, there is an error in that it points to xhtml/fw/01hh instead of en/xhtml/fw/01hh
[so: Seems to be fixed] |
| (ne) | intro: | Italy and Sweden -> Italy, and Sweden [LM] |
| (ne) | Dateline to Disaster: | 1900-1998 -> 1990-1998 |
| (ne) | Dateline to Disaster: | 2012 New Years Day -> 2012 New Year's Day |
| (ne) | Dateline to Disaster: | the earths frozen surface -> the earth's frozen surface |
| (ne) | Cal's Story: | twenty five -> twenty-five |
| (ne) | Cal's Story: | radio lint -> radio line [Mark B] [so: should be 'radio link'] |
| (ne) | Cal's Story: | thenstamped -> then stamped |
| (ne) | Cal's Story: | subzero -> sub-zero [Mark B at least, that's how I've always seen it written] [irs: also used as sub-zero in FW4] |
| (ne) | gamerulz: | you have a CLOSE COMBAT SKILL total of 15 [so: CLOSE needs to be in small CAPS to match 'COMBAT SKILL'] |
| (ne) | The Game Rules: | Linkify "Action Chart" |
| (ne) | Survival Skills: | Slaughter Mountain Run [so: linkify to where the book will eventually be] |
| (ne) | weapons: | The maximum number of close combat weapons you may carry is two. [so: two should be italicised.] [irs: best way to do this?] [jb: <em> tag] |
| (ne) | Rules For Close Combat: | All ENDURANCE points lost by the enemy [so: ENDURANCE needs to be in small CAPS] |
| (ne) | Rules For Close Combat: | CLOSE COMBAT SKILL [encode as attribute] |
| (ne) | Close Combat: | [LM: link from <close combat> leads to <numbered sections> not section 1] |
| (ne) | 16: | 201 -> 291 |
| (ne) | 18: | 320 -> 329 |
| (ne) | 22, 161: | map [so: link to map] |
| (ne) | 26: | [so: choice 2 should lead to section 111 (link broken)] |
| (ne) | 28: | 4 -> 64 |
| (ne) | 43: | [so: choice 1 should link to section 240 (link broken)] |
| (ne) | 50: | wrong.' you -> wrong,' you |
| (ne) | 56: | We'll be -> 'We'll be |
| (ne) | 60: | [so: option 1 should link to Section 331 (link broken)] |
| (ne) | 75: | Swiftly you withdrew -> Swiftly you withdraw [LM] |
| (ne) | 99: | motor cycles -> motorcycles [LM] |
| (ne) | 152, 255: | [so: IRS to replace table with image] |
| (ne) | 165: | Missing punctuation at the end of the second paragraph. |
| (ne) | 181: | onto [LM: not an error. i just wanted to point out that it's 'onto' here not 'on to']
[jb: Looks OK to me. I'm not sure what is being suggested.] |
| (ne) | 196: | to he blocking -> to be blocking |
| (ne) | 204: | Long lake's -> Long Jake's |
| (ne) | 213: | 162 -> 182 |
| (ne) | 229: | is no parked -> is now parked [LM] |
| (ne) | 229: | ENDURANCE POINTS -> ENDURANCE points [LM] |
| (ne) | 251: | 120 -> 126 |
| (ne) | 252: | score Is now -> score is now [LM] |
| (ne) | 254: | C-12 [LM: ref. 333 has 'G-12'] |
| (ne) | 257: | 169 -> 189 |
| (ne) | 259: | 167 -> 187 |
| (ne) | 261: | If your total score is now 1l or more -> If your total score is now 11 or more [LM] |
| (ne) | 265: | Missing punctuation at the end of the first paragraph. |
| (ne) | 266: | 165 -> 185 |
| (ne) | 273: | parking, lot -> parking lot [LM] |
| (ne) | 279: | [so: Split signpost onto two lines.] |
| (ne) | 318: | McKinney. The girl, -> McKinney, the girl, [first sentence is a fragment... either combine the sentences using a comma as above, or modify the first one to be complete][IRS: original text has a comma, so simple NE change] |
| (ne) | 339: | 296 -> 298 |
| (ne) | 347: | [so: choice 1 should lead to Section 11 (link broken)] |
| (ne) | 350: | SLAUGHTER MOUNTAIN RUN [so: linkify] |
| (ne) | illtable: | Small Illustrations not listed. |
| (ne) | map: | [jb: We need to either get a better scan of the map, or sharpen the image up. It's too blurry to read.] |
| Footnotes |
| (ft) | Rules For Close Combat: | [It is not necessarily true that Cal Phoenix will lose any ENDURANCE in combat. He may go unscathed.] [jb: We haven't fixed this for any other books, but we should. What do you think: "with a possibly reduced ENDURANCE point score"?] [irs: reworded the whole paragraph for consistency with LW and GS books, (see below)] |
| (ft) | Rules For Close Combat: | This procedure continues until the ENDURANCE points of either the enemy or Cal Phoenix are reduced to zero, at which point the one whose score is zero is declared dead. If Cal Phoenix is dead, the adventure is over. If the enemy is dead, Cal Phoenix proceeds but with a reduced ENDURANCE point score. -> This procedure continues until the ENDURANCE points of either the enemy or Cal Phoenix are reduced to zero or below, at which point that combatant is declared dead. If Cal Phoenix is dead, the adventure is over. If the enemy is dead, Cal Phoenix proceeds but with his ENDURANCE points possibly reduced. |
| (ft) | 5: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of ammunition from your Ammo Pouch] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct six rounds of 9mm ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 20: | [so: requires a footnote: 'This is the correct answer to the keypad puzzle in Section 152.'] |
| (ft) | 23: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 28: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of ammunition from your Ammo Pouch] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct a round of 7.62mm ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 58: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 62: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct a round of 12-gauge ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 64: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch (if any).'] |
| (ft) | 76: | [LM: If you possess a Pistol (do we need a footnote specifying that a machine pistol does not count here? this wasn't clear to me at first, but individual bullets are specified in ref287)] |
| (ft) | 77: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct a round of 7.62mm ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 96: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 98: | [so: requires a footnote: 'This is the correct answer to the keypad puzzle in Section 255.'] |
| (ft) | 132: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 143: | [LM: add the footnote about deleting relevant number of rounds here?] |
| (ft) | 153: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct six rounds of 9mm ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 164: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 168: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 172: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 174: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [LM: according to ref287, you already erase the one or more bullets fired] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct one round of 9mm ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 190: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 191: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 206: | your weapon is kicked from your grasp [LM: do you lose this weapon?] |
| (ft) | 229: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 261: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct a round of 9mm ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 275: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 293: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 297: | (can you not refill your canteen here?) [LM] |
| (ft) | 302: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 320: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of ammunition from your Ammo Pouch] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct a round of 12-gauge ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 340: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 344: | [irs: Added footnote: 'Remember to deduct a round of 9mm ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 348: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct a round of 12-gauge ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| (ft) | 349: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added as 'Remember to deduct the relevant number of rounds from your Ammo Pouch.'] |
| Rejected |
| gasolene -> gasoline - affects CS, 1, 70, 196, 219 [jb: gasolene] |
| pain killers -> painkillers - affects Equipmnt, 175, 216, 303 [jb: pain killers] |
| Does your Backpack affect Stealth rolls while driving (e.g. Section 150)? I don't think it's possible to drive while wearing your Backpack![irs: disagree, you always seem to have your backpack with you unless it is specifically removed] [jb: We don't have a good reason to argue that a backpack wouldn't affect your Stealth score (a stand in for Dexterity in this case).] |
| [JD: style issue -- HAVOC -> H.A.V.O.C. ?? affects Cal's Story, Dateline to Disaster, and Sect 318] [jb: HAVOC] |
Should an ellipsis have a trailing space between words (e.g. 295: "Mineral Wells... Radio" vs. "Mineral Wells...Radio"
Currently, ellipses have a trailing space, except when they abut punctuation (</quote> or ?,.!) | [jb: The space is intentional to set it apart from the text. If we were going to change house style, I would favor adding another space at the beginning of the ellipsis, not removing the last one.] |
| (er) | Dateline to Disaster: | deadline by twenty-four hours -> deadline by 24 hours [NJM: Style?] [so: I think this is unnecessary] [irs: agree, unnecessary] [jb: skip it] |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | another colony who were based in -> another colony that was based in [Mark B] [jb: skip it - fine as is] |
| (er) | Cal's Story: | shock wave -> shockwave [so: Not required] |
| (er) | The Game Rules: | Your knowledge and experience of all aspects -> Your knowledge of and experience with all aspects [Mark B] [jb: skip it] |
| (er) | Cal's Story, The Game Rules, 141, 297: | on to -> onto [irs: I'm not sure about these ones, all the others have been fixed]
[jb: Changed only The Game Rules.] |
| (er) | Survival Skills: | entirely how you like [so: is this grammatically OK?] [jb: non-standard sentence order but OK] |
| (er) | Rules For Close Combat: | ENDURANCE points of either the enemy or Cal Phoenix are reduced [so: . . . is reduced] [jb: ENDURANCE points ... are reduced] |
| (er) | 1: | shovel, and a rusty revolver -> shovel and a rusty revolver [jb: skip it] |
| (er) | 23: | C'mon you two -> C'mon, you two [jb: breaks flow of exclamation - skip it] |
| (er) | 29: | (it appears that cal is walking out of the campus, but he drove in cf ref 82) [LM]
[jb: fixing 82 instead] |
| (er) | 31: | File or -> File, or [jb: Serial comma only required in lists of three or more.] |
| (er) | 43: | N a C 1 -> NaCl [JD] [IRS: While I agree that the '1' should definitely be an 'l' (damn OCR), I'm of the opinion that the spaces were intended to be there and should remain. The text is written as though the letters are being spelled out individually, rather than specifically being recognised as a chemical symbol.] [NJM: Actual symbol would not contain spaces] [jb: agreed] |
| (er) | 48: | weapons or backpack -> Weapons or Backpack [NJM] [so: I think this is unnecessary] [jb: skip it] |
| (er) | 53, 128, 281: | weapon and -> weapon, and [jb: Compound verb does not require a comma.] |
| (er) | 58: | has proved -> has proven [LM]
[jb: proven and proved are mostly equivalent] |
| (er) | 68: | Don't delay now. -> Don't delay, now. [jb: I'm not clear what part "now" plays in the sentence. It mostly seems like a colloquialism.] |
| (er) | 78: | creases your thigh -> grazes your thigh [so: maybe?] [irs: disagree, creases is valid] |
| (er) | 83: | Electra-glide -> Electra-Glide [jb: skip it - hyphenated capitalization is standard as-is] |
| (er) | 90, 133, 327: | Rad-vics -> rad-vics [NJM: Not sure about this one] [jb: It seems used like another gang name and isn't non-standard. Leave as-is.] |
| (er) | 106: | snake bite -> snakebite [jb: snake bite seems more popular - leave as-is] |
| (er) | 116: | flick the power switch on -> flick the power switch [or, flick the power switch to on]
[jb: I don't know if this is just in America, but this is pretty standard (if slightly redundant) usage.] |
| (er) | 116, 290: | If you possess a missile weapon -> If you possess a missile weapon, and sufficient ammunition to use it [jb: Serial comma only required in lists of three or more.] |
| (er) | 119: | sulphonamides, and -> sulphonamides and [irs: rejected, see section 143] |
| (er) | 123: | saying, every little helps. -> ??? saying, 'every little helps'. [LM] |
| (er) | 125: | Perception skill total is 3 or less -> Perception skill total is 3 (how is it possible to be less?) [LM]
[jb: Are there any relevant penalties earlier in the text?]
[so: It's impossible to have a Perception below 3 at this point.] |
| (er) | 129: | claw-like -> clawlike [jb: leave as-is] |
| (er) | 135: | 100 -> a hundred [so: maybe?] [jb: skip it - customary to use numerals for large numbers] |
| (er) | 139: | cave, 'the -> cave. 'The [LM] |
| (er) | 142: | gear shift -> gearshift [jb: skip it] |
| (er) | 143: | Serum, sulphonamides, and -> Serum, sulphonamides and [so: Actually, we are using the serial comma as standard, so this one will probably be rejected.] [irs: agree with so] |
| (ne) | 152: | [so: centralise the table] [irs: better done with CSS, rather than XML?] [jb: right] [irs: since we're replacing table with image, this is redundant] |
| (er) | 156: | that the convoy waits -> that the convoy wait [LM] |
| (er) | 170: | lil' -> l'il [??] [irs: I don't think this is necessary] |
| (er) | 177: | barrel; but -> barrel, but [LM] |
| (er) | 183: | Six-pac -> Six-Pac |
| (er) | 196: | Telescope or -> Telescope, or [jb: Serial comma only required in lists of three or more.] |
| (er) | 198: | tumped -> jumped [MB: or dumped? unless "tumped" is meant to be slang?][IRS: There are several references online to "tumped" indeed being Texan slang for "turned over".][SO: I'd agree that this is fine as it is.] |
| (er) | 170: | a' skirtin' -> a-skirtin' [??]
[jb: I'm not positive what a' is short for, but it seems to read better with the apostrophe than with a hyphen.] |
| (er) | 236: | think or feel or be -> think, or feel, or be [LM] |
| (er) | 270: | that the convoy waits -> that the convoy wait [MB: I was a bit undecided on this one, but after some deliberation I believe "wait" is more correct) [IRS: No idea.] [jb: Debatable, but "waits" is not clearly incorrect and "wait" sounds contrived. I'd leave as-is.] |
| (er) | 270: | that the convoy waits -> that the convoy wait [LM] |
| (er) | 286: | emit a hideous shriek -> emit hideous shrieks [NJM: Maybe?] [jb: Good ol' Lipsync and Catsup. I see what you're saying, but I can also see their combined shrieks becomes one hideous one. I'd leave as-is.] |
| (er) | 295: | that the convoy continues -> that the convoy continue [LM] |
| (er) | 307: | If you have a missile weapon, and wish to use it -> If you wish to return fire with your missile weapon [jb: How seriously do we want to entertain the idea that the player has dropped their missile weapon alread?] |
| (er) | 336: | N a C l -> NaCl (cf. ref. 43) [LM]
[SO: Should we make use of the <ch.thinspace/> element for these two occurrences?] |
| (er) | 347: | Binoculars or -> Binoculars, or [jb: Serial comma only required in lists of three or more.] |
| (er) | 350: | being abducted: the Maverick -> being abducted; the Maverick [LM] |
| Rejected Footnotes |
| (ft) | 8: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 96 and 344 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 41: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 340 and 302 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 87: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 172 and 23 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 102: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 172 and 23 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 108: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 340 and 302 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 140: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 96 and 153 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 159: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 340 and 302 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 254: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 340 and 302 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 264: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 96 and 77 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 268: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 172 and 23 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 308: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 172 and 23 instead (better positioning)] |
| (ft) | 310: | [so: Remember to deduct a round of Ammunition from your Ammo Pouch.] [irs: Added to sections 96 and 62 instead (better positioning)] |
| Illustration Placements |
| small 1 | Cactus+mesa | [so: Cal's Story, Section 82, 232, 309, 343] [irs: agree: CS, 232, 309; disagree: 82, 343 (use small 10)] |
| small 2 | Dashboard+road | [so: 22, 36, 144?, 160, 211, 295, 315, 347] [irs: agree: 22, 36, 160, 211, 295, 315; disagree: 144, 347] |
| small 3 | Rifle+shotgun | [so: ("shotgun") 26, 35?, 72, 87, 111, 118?, 159, 168?, 176, 191?, 192?, 208?, 210?, 214?, 220?, 247?, 279?, 328?, 334, 348 / ("rifle") 21?, 27?, 28, 40, 41, 99?, 104?, 119, 138?, 143, 145, 163, 178?, 180, 210?, 233, 243?, 264, 288, 321?, 328?, 349?] [irs: agree: 26, 72, 87, 111, 159, 191, 208, 214, 334, 348, 28, 40, 41, 145, 180, 233, 264, 288; disagree: 35, 118, 168, 176, 192, 210, 220, 247, 279, 328, 21, 27, 99, 104, 119, 138, 143, 163, 178, 210, 243, 321, 328, 349 (if that's not too many uses)] |
| small 4 | Walled town (DC1) | [so: Cal's Story, Section 211, 222] [irs: Agree CS, 211; disagree: 222] |
| small 5 | Freeway Warrior badge | [so: Cal's Story] [irs: Agree CS] |
| small 6 | Boots, Shotgun, carts, jacket, Water Canteen | [so: Equipment, Section 143?, 175?, 220?, 303?] [irs: agree: Equipment; disagree: 143, 175, 220, 303] |
| small 8 | Texas State sign | [so: ("Texas") Cal's Story, Section 105, 160, 161] [irs: agree: CS, 105, 160, 161] |
| small 9 | Lions flag | [so: Sections 36?, 68?, 135?, 150, 243, 332] [irs: agree: 135, 243, 332; disagree: 36, 68, 150, ] |
| small 10 | Longhorn skull | [so: Section 343] [irs: agree: 343] |
| small 11 | Highway 20 sign | [so: Sections 17, 93, 178, 182, 327] [irs: agree: 17, 93, 178, 182, 327] |
| small 12 | Machine Pistol | [so: Sections 2, 23?, 131, 138?, 163?, 165?, 166?, 217?, 229?, 260?, 301?, 317?, 335?] [irs: agree: 2, 131 ; disagree: 23, 138, 163, 165, 166, 217, 229, 260, 301, 317, 335] |
Errata
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